Picture perfect

Time to change my profile picture, I rummage through my numerous folders to find that perfect picture. A perfect picture is one which is likely to fetch most comments and likes, one which people would rave about, one which would highlights my gorgeous hair, falling oh so perfectly, teeth white enough to give the Colgate add a run for it's money and face photoshoped beyond recognition. There were moments from my past, where me and my friends would go on a clicking spree, until the perfect pic was achieved. Folders named categorically with dates, frequent uploading on FB, waiting for strangers to shower their praises. Life for us was shallow and we were too naive to realize that true beauty doesn't have to be skin deep. I bet,  random people on the web are likely to send you a friend request if your gorgeous and  no one would even bother to visit your profile if you have stuck up image of Hannah Montana or a 'CUTE'  little kid as your DP.

Within months I have grown wiser, for me pictures are scarp book, one which would take me through the memory lane, make my eyes moist, make me giggle and bring in 1000's of odd emotions. I remember the day when my 1st laptop crashed , all my college pics went into dumps with it and so did 4 years of memory. Back at Amrita when my classmate accidentally erased whole of my C drive I did a thandav, not because my tools were erased off and I would have to bug 100 people to get it re-installed but, I was more irked by the fact that my terabytes of photo memory was lost. Things have changed and I try to embed the photographic pose up in my brain, capturing the beauty of the image, all the while savouring the instance. I am no more panicky and never attempts to try to balance my camera with one hand while stuffing my mouth with my favorite dessert. These moments should not lay forgotten in one's folders instead should be framed into one's consciousness. I have locked out my profile picture folders nor do I update picture frequently like before.

It set me thinking why the hell are we so intrested in creating new pics folder every week?.

Customer Satisfaction

I just felt like pouring all my angst into this blog. This is my vain attempt to prove myself right, after failing to do so on a wider platform. As a customer, what do you expect from a service, a site, a shop?. You expect them to outperform your expectations, or being a realistic person you are, you would expect them to fulfill the clauses they have promised. Anything below or down par is not acceptable as there are millions of other options waiting for you out  there and why should one stick to this brand/site alone?. My gain will in turn effect  the brand's/site's loss and in this era of mass communication a little negative publicity can topple even the biggies.


I am no expert in customer relationship, but as an end user it hurts when my expectations are not met with for instance, last day I rang up Airtel customer care on the hope of finding a solution to the ever frequent call drop at specific time of 1:10 and 2:10. Every time I make an international call to my clients, the call gets dropped at specific time. Every time  I have to pacify the clients by explaining that there is an issue with the connection. On those sudden calls to my dad where I have to tell him to pick me up from office, the call gets cut midway. I tried calling 121, 123 to speak to their customer care exec but, without any luck. Finally, my brother did manage to find a way to contact the customer care. First you will have to press 2 so that you can get more info about the GPRS offers. Hallo!! a normal customer would expect the customer care key to be present in the main menu. Why would anyone bother to press GPRS and then again 9 to talk to customer care executive?. My connection was getting dropped even before I could press the lucky number 9, after trying for 8 times I gave up. Dad who himself own a post paid connection with Airtel gave me his phone to dial the customer care. By the time the whole incident happened I was on fire, fuming and the moment the customer care rep(A lady) took the phone, I started spitting venom. She got angry at me and told me that as my connection is prepaid she will have to transfer to some other section. The call was transferred, and a guy took up. This time I explained patiently to the guy about the issue and how much problem it's causing me. He told me there is no issue with my sim and told he will transfer me to some other section. The bloody guy put me on hold for 15 minutes and then the call was cut. I mean WTH!!!, I am recharging every week religiously with my hard earned cash and I have every right to know why my calls are getting cut and that too at exact same intervals. Being Airtel or having a great add doesn't mean you are invincible and no one will raise a finger against your service.


Moving on to another site Bestylish.com. Online shopping is slowly catching up in India and being one not to be left out I joined the bandwagon and ordered something from their site on Nov3rd. After my transaction was complete I expected them to send me a confirmation mail regarding receiving payment. Alas No!!I didn't receive any and the next day I send a mail asking them to confirm the same and that's when I received confirmation. Common, if the site doesn't let me know if they have received the cash how will I ever know?. What if they don't and my hard earned cash disappears into thin air with both agents refusing to accept it's their mistake?. Finally A week passed and I expected my courier to arrive any moment. Alas No!! I again had to ring them up and ask em if they had send me the courier... the guy tells me that my order is cancelled as the item didn't pass quality tests. If so, why bother fooling me and other lakhs of customers by putting up the pic of the good which is defective?. In that scenario, ideally I would have expected the company to replace my order( I would have happily obliged) and send me my good in 3 days may be then I would have been impressed or even it would have been okay if their refund process was completed in 2-3 days. Being the site they are and being taken for granted that they are I didn't expect both the ideal scenarios and Oh boy I was right. And what about my refund?. Weeks passed and I am yet to get one!!. I would never ever shop from their site no matter what lucrative offer they put in. I have reported it their agents and also posted a message on their FB wall. No action has been taken yet. Whenever people ask me about the site, I tell em without even blinking an eyelid NOT TO TRUST EM. I know me not trusting em won't do any damage but still, when it comes to mouth to mouth publicising and mass media publicising, I can cause a small damage and their possible buyers from my circle has eroded and none of my friends may never try this site.


I don't know but some of the best bloggers feel that mushrooming online portals may initially give you a good treatment and as they grow they tend to take their consumers for granted. Because they are a brand , they consider themselves to be above the consumers and this would eventually lead to their own downfall. 


Am I being unreasonable here?. Spending big bucks, I expect quality, options and time from the brand I am loyal to. After all money doesn't grow on trees.

I vs ME

I have nothing worthwhile to write about, something that would inspire the person on the other side. Yesterday during one of our regular chatroom dramas, myself and Tbabu were talking about the inevitable :CHANGE. If I stand in front of the mirror and let Opal from the past have a conversation with this image, she would surely drub the ME as over girlish-self obsessed-diplomatic-aimless human being. I wouldn't be able to recognise ME, and I am everything I never wanted to be 4 years back. Time has this strange way of creating havoc in your life, it tosses you around and teaches you the truth the HARD way. I have changed and that's is something I have to own the responsibility for. I could have resisted the tides and stood up against TIME but, I didn't instead I just let it take me into the No entry zone. So, next time I tell myself "I AM NOT GONNA BE LIKE THAT", I will pause and think for a moment. What if few years down the lane, I become exactly that NOT GONNA BE types?. I am open to changes, I am ready to embrace them and make em a part of my life.

A Short Story

She felt weightless, as her eyes fixated from white dress clad fairies to the blurred images of people she recognized back from her memory. She was trying to remember her story. Loud weeps by her mother was not at all helping, she found it annoying. She was losing blood and litres of it and soon she would be joining her nagging grandparents in heaven. She wanted to narrate her story before her name was permanently erased from this planet.

Born as the eldest daughter of an upper middle class family, she had everything that an average girl could wish, a house, doting parents, a brat brother, shelves filled with medals and trophies that her parents proudly talked about to their colleagues, a handsome boyfriend whom her parents loved (they even were making arrangements for their wedding). Then why did she take such an extreme step? Love failure? NO! ghosts from her past? NO then what?. You may find it hard to digest but, she was a victim of depression. She always felt unloved, she always felt lonely, she always felt she was not good enough, she never had REAL friends. She knew something was wrong with her, she tried to talk with her parents and boyfriend but, both of them rubbished it of as her changing mood due to fluctuating hormone levels. She fought with ‘him’ over their dwindling conversations, he counter attacked saying he was too tired to hear her ramblings. On another day, she complained how lonely she felt even after being in a relationship and again he counter attacked her by telling that he was not a mind reader. She closed her doors shut, wept with her head under the pillow, smudged the kajal all over her face after all the only things she wanted were: to be reminded everyday that she was loved, she wanted to be held in his arms and be embraced, she wanted to be woken up by his dreams but, all she had were nightmares. The more she tried to push away, the more steeper she fell into a world she had not fathomed, she was eclipsed by dark clouds sucking away her joy. All she wanted was someone, anyone to hear her heart breaking tears, her sound echoed through vacuum and her own echo hit her ears hard. She felt this heart piercing call, to hurt , to torture her soul, she could derive happiness from proving her worthlessness. She tried to distract herself from the repeated calls by indulging in shopping. She forgot that material things could just provide momentary happiness, she would feel tinge of happiness when she touched and felt new things but, soon they would pave way to more guilt and turmoil. She filled in his absence with books and blogs, neither could either do any justice in erasing her pain. Finally, it was time to take a decision...the faces of all those she loved dearly appeared before her, it was as if watching a movie, a small biopic played before her....her  baby steps, her first day in school, college everything was being played out in random order. As she held the blade closer to her wrists she could imagine the pale faces of her parents, the pain it would cause them but, she had to get away with the pain which was consuming her..... she was left with no choice. She let the sharp edges of the blade kiss her flesh, she gasped for fresh air ....she saw blood all around.... She was losing blood and litres of it and soon she would be joining her nagging grandparents in heaven. She wanted to narrate her story before her name is permanently erased from this planet.

My Hero

Biting into my veg burger, my thought process was interrupted by my mom. Sitting opposite to me, munching her fries, she started the conversation

"You should write the blooper your dad did today in the blog (More on that later). People who know my dad from here and here needs no introduction to the GUY no:1 of my life. But, there is more to this man than what meets the eye.

He may give you that rough and tough attitude....even brush you in the wrong way, but behind all that ruggedness is a man who knows only to love unconditionally. As a little girl, like all the girls of my age my dad was the first super hero I admired and looked upto. No superman or spiderman could match the super powers my dad possessed. He had answers to all my silly questions, he had the magic wand to make all my problems disappear and more importantly he was one person with whom I could ramble endlessly.

As years passed, during the growing up stages I got quite attached to my mom. Though we never get along she could read my mind. I had to share all my secrets, had to have her with me during my bad days and I couldn't sleep without fighting with her. Somewhere along the road, dad was sidelined. For me he was more of a father figure, unapproachable and I was sure: A GUY CAN'T UNDERSTAND ME!!

Sometimes dad did let me know about his feelings and the pain of missing out on my life was evident from his eyes as he watched me and my mom talking ear to ear. 

Dad's road to success was not smooth. As the 3rd child (eldest son) of a war veteran and housewife he didn't get his way around like we did. Having to travel 10 kms per day to reach the school or not being able to afford new school uniform each academic year, he had seen the worst .But, what separated him was his tryst to learn, to grow . I have heard his sister say that he was extremely talented in languages. After his 10th, when his father told him to quit school and join him in farming, my dad was aghast. He wanted to continue his studies but didn’t have the resources to follow his heart nor did his father’s small income allow him to dream big. That’s where my dad's sister came into picture, married to an army guy she took him under her wings. A change in scenery ensued from lush green Kerala to land of desserts: Rajasthan, it was a drastic change for this young man.

He made it into Narcotics department all the while continuing his education. After 10 years he moved back to Kerala and to Customs. He married his superior’s daughter (Mom) and happily lived ever after.

I have never seen my dad upset and angry not even in situation where an ordinary person like you or me would think of giving up. He always maintains his calm at home (Though in office it's complete different ball game). I respect him for his vast knowledge; he is one of the best in Customs laws. He is never afraid to speak his mind, even to his seniors. He is the best shopping buddy as he even nudges me to shop. He has never told me NEVER or NO!!!. The biggest shoker was this incident when I truly realized the depth of my ignorance. One day while on phone with my fiancé, my dad happened to hear our conversation. All through the conversation I kept calling name, instead of the customary "CHETTA" my dad came upto me and said "You are so unromantic". Mine!!! Something that I hadn’t expected. Nowadays I do make sure that I put forward everything in front of dad first because he is more open to ideas, more onto my side than the other peoples (My mom on the other hand makes up for it with the sentence "what will people think")

Ok!I could go on and on like this about the virtues my dad possesses. Enough of praising my dad, what comes to mind is this dialogue by Suriya from the film Varanam Ayirram" NEE THAAN ENUUDE HERO DADDY" (YOU ARE MY HERO DADDY)

30 things to do before I turn 30

1. Prepare a sumptuous Kerala veg meal inclusive of 2 types of payasam(Kheer)

2. Get my licence both, 2 and 4 wheeler.

3. Take my parents to an international holiday.

4. Beat a guy in computer games.

5. Travel to 4 corners of India (Goa, Arunachal Pradesh, Kashmir and Andamans)

6. Learn Salsa or any latina dance.

7. Turn vegetarian for a year.

8. Try at least one adventure sport.

9. Go down from size -- to size 26.

10. Buy a branded bag (A ZARA /MANGO/ALDO will do)

11. Walk on a 4 inch platform heels without falling.
12. Get my EX-MBA and move up to the post of Analyst before point 20.

13. Attend my brother's post graduate ceremony if he intends to postgraduate .

14. Buy myself a diamond stud.

15. Stay away from technology for 1 month ie, mobiles/ net etc.

16. Hug a dog.

17. Have authentic Chinese food.

18. Pray every day, and make it a habit.

19. Visit my school with my buddies and spend a whole day in 12 A.

20. Change company.

21. Go clubbing.

22. Buy "our own" house.

23. Not to fight with anyone for 3 months, not even an angry thought.

24. Walk on a beach @ 12.night, barefooted.

25. Streak my hair purple.

26. Say sorry to SOMEONE I have hurt.

27. Punch someone/anyone.(After my 3 months of being a good girl)

28. Spend one day, every year in an orphanage.

29. Write dairy every day.

30. Say a joke, to which everyone will laugh to.

Hoping for the best, lets see how it goes.

HAAR EK FRIEND ZAROORI HOTHA HAI

There is not even a single soul out there who doesn't love AIRTEL's latest ad campaign "HAAR EK FRIEND ZAROORI HOTHA HAI", which translates to each one of the friends are important . Airtel make it a point to call everyone around you "A" friend, how nice it would be to live in an imaginary world where there are no enemies right?.


So, here is my list of Zaroori friends


Hang-around friends : The kind of friend you have fun with, the kind of friend that you mall hop with, the kind of friend who understands your shopping sensibilities, the kind of friend who insists on paying the bill.

Back up Best friend  : While in school I had this friend, who was pretty close to me, he knew everything about me INSIDE-OUT still, I wouldn't call him my best friend. Why you may wonder...Cause I already had one. So, this friend was always the back up best friend someone who would console you, stand by you, fight for you, tease you and love you unconditionally even though you are never ready to hand him/her the crown of best friend.


Black Box friend : The thing about black box?. The box takes everything in without letting even a beam of light escape. Black box friends are the best secret keepers, one who safe guards you deepest-darkest-meanest  secrets.


Strange friend : One day this person comes and talks to you, the next day as you wave your hands up in the air, smiling wide they walk past you as you don't exist. This is exactly the type of friend you can never understand. The type that confuses you if there exists a friendship if any.


Silly friends : The jokers of the gang. They make you laugh and you are your brightest best around them. They say the silliest of things at the wrongest of times and you are left with no option other than to give a heartiest laugh.


We- don't -get along friends : I have a problem with this category. They are the one who finds fault with everything you do. I don't want to equalise this category with "Not a friend" cause everyone is a friend in this imaginary world so, this category likes nothing about you and the feeling is mutual. I had come across this category quite a few number of time.


Dramabaaz friend : The animated expressions, the extremity of emotions, one laugh and thud a fight and we are back together declaration, nothing can describe this volatile relationship better.


The emotionless friend : Hey that was a joke, pale expression. Hey that's so sad, pale expression. The expression seems straight out from the 70's zombies show. Sun or rain they have their trademark expression pasted over every season of the year. Whatever, the shortcoming he/she still is your friend right? :P


So, which category do you fall into?. Or do you have a definition of your own?


image:google

Teenage Drama!!!

"Di it is so last season" B had a quick glance at my evening dress, she swiftly turned her focus to her fb page. Last season? I murmured to myself, 2 months before as I walked out of the trial room wearing the same dress, I couldn't help but pat on my back for my fashion sense and today a girl 7 years younger was telling me that I looked like an old women?. 


On my recent trip to Delhi, me and my family stayed over at my uncles place. The week long tour was a peek into the life of a 16 year old teenage girl, with whom I shared the room .The week long tour brought back some memories and I couldn't resist the temptation of comparing her present life with my good old days. Every where I turned to, I saw young girls dressed way over their age. Most of them looked like a mirror image of each other, same loud music, dressing sense and even the same hair style. For, someone who had quite an uneventful teenage days I was baffled.During the mall days back at Cochin, me and my brother used to sit in one corner people watching, we would calculate the average age of mall throbbing youngsters and it would be around 16-17 year max. Most of them stylishly dressed, holding arms with a stud/drop dead gorgeous girl by their side and that lets me wonder " How much on an average does these kids spend?". When I was in 11th, I would have to beg a hundred million times in front of my dad so that he would give into my loud soabs and  hand an extra 30 rupees as pocket money so that I could have my favorite shake that day. Things were different back then, there were no malls, having boyfriends were still a taboo in our society and most importantly consumerism wasn't a term heard quite much even in a communist state like ours. Things have changed! malls have sprouted up in every nook and corner of the city, kids actually love spending time bowling or playing video games in malls , and people prefer KFC and McD  over real food. 


And all these happened right in front of my eyes and I never knew!!!. I have a brother, 4 years younger but, he still has to beg like I used to , to get extra 10 bucks as pocket money. Okie, comming back to the point I try to melt in , fake in as the sheep, wear a sheep's coat and look cheap in it. Acting my age comes natural to me but, not faking the part of a 16 year old teenage girl. I have reasons to believe I live in an illusioned world cause at 23, I still can't wear my make up or still can't get the names of any boy bands right. I must have lived in some prehistoric times.


Does that mean I am completely against the teenage fun?NO!!! I mean, I don't have anything to look back to and gush, I don't have trazillion pics to choose from for my FB DP, I don't have heart breaks to boast off, I clearly didn't have fun. Times are chnaging and so should you and me. There are moments when I absolutely wish I were a teengae girl, reliving the teenage drama phase and then there are moments where I am thankful to my parents for keeping me grounded to the reality. 


The trip did teach me few essential tips to tackle my own future generations:

listen to a teenager: They may have a valid point, you can have your way around after you are done with the hearing part


Understand: The times that we grew in is entirely different from the present scenarios. Don't judge.


Watch: Always be careful, adrenaline high teenager may not be the right judge of a situation but, as a grown up you can and should.


Look up: Never treat them like kids, they are individuals wanting to be heard so always give and take respect.

Work Wear Issues

So many unfinished, not worthy to be published post lying in my drafts. And here goes my latest attempt to write. When I joined my company nearly 1 and a half years back, there were no specific policy on work wear. As a matter of fact, we did have a 4 page pdf on what to and what not to wear to work place, HELL!!! no one bothered.On a regular working day, one could see strip/acid washed jeans, funky tees and all those not to be worn attires making rounds through the campus. I do know guys who have survived through meetings and deadlines in just 'A' jeans and their ever trust worthy black Rock-N-Roll tees. After I shifted my base to Cochin, things took an U-turn for good, people here dress to work in simple, understated work wears. I ditched my old ways and settled in for more work friendly attires. After numerous mixing , matching, filtering, deciding what to wear I absorbed in the idea of "wearing" your work.


I would still wear my Jeans and tees on those lazy mornings when wearing a  traditional wear was unfathomable. On some week days I stretched my jeans ability to survive any more dust and dirt. Last day we received a company mailer asking all employees to dress professionally to work. Jokes flew, and everyone was analyzing everyone else from head to toe. Some of my colleagues came running to me and pointed the mailer and asked " How will you survive from the week on?. No hanging earring, no crazy color combination, no that in your face shoes" and I had to reason with literally everyone , I mean what does work wear mean? Black and white devoid of any color? devoid of pretty prints?. 


On Monday I came to work wearing a brown kurta, white leggings , white golden border shawl and nude heels. The security was staring on my legs, may be they expected me to wear something as I wore the last Friday, my yellow sunny peeptoe. I smiled and went in wearing my confidence on my collar or rather my shawl. Hours later, a girl wearing an above knee length kurtha and black leggings from the same ODC came up to me and asked me if the security had warned me of wearing inappropriate dress. She narrated her conversation with the gaurds and it seems, leggings are inappropriate to be worn to work. HMMM!!!! even one of my team mate was complaining on how the security felt about her tight churi being work inappropriate. I pinged some of my Bangalore friends and asked if the same condition prevailed there and they gave me a super confused expression cause no one bothered to tell them that leggings were banned. That made me super red, I mean how can a tight churi, a below knee kurta, or a bright yellow dress be termed as work inappropriate?. The company policy does not site any of the above mentioned into banned lot. Banning something or asking us not to wear something just cause we are in south is bloody BULLSHIT. A sleeveless or a shorts being inappropriate in general public's eyes is no excuse to behave in a way they did. I was left off cause I had worn a shawl with my dress as my whole ensemble was passed off as a churidhar where as, the girl behind me with her leggings and short kurta caught the gaurd's eye. Asking us not to wear a sleeveless cause this is Kerala is bullshit. This is corporate Mr. security, and even if I turn up at work wearing  just knee length pencil skirt and a tucked in shirt u will have to let me in cause that my friend is a WORK WEAR.

When life gives you LEMONS, make LEMONADE

I have multimillion things to share, starting with the reason for absence from blogger for over a month. I was bamboozled at work, working late nights, weekend panic attacks, rushing through deadlines all for a greater good: A WEEK LONG VACATION!!!!. I am a planner, I plan everything in life starting from my goals to mundane things like what to wear to work the NEXT week. On one of those relatively easy on the schedule days when I could stretch and take my eyes off my computer I drew up a plan on what I would wear for the entire vacation week. The plan consisted of a detailed approach and included lists of items I should carry. By Friday evening I was pretty much sure I wouldn't be able to reach home earlier than 11pm... I couldn't care much for, I had a task at hand and responsibility to finish before I could sip my Marguerite and enjoy the colors of fall. I reached back home tired and wanting to rest my back on my comfy bed, in midst of extreme tiredness I FORGOT to pack my bags. The next day morning when the cuckoo flew over my next, dad was heard straining his vocal chords, it was more of a war cry I believe. He threatened to abandon me if I didn't bring my suitcase down in 10 minutes. I opened my wardrobe, pulled out whatever I could lay my hands on and was present downstairs in a matter of 5 minutes. At that point missing my flight was far more important than looking chic and stylish during the vacations. The point I want to highlight is No matter how much we plan and plot, life decides it's own.

Life has given me many U-turns. Many times, I have stood at the cross roads and wondered "WHAT NEXT". We humans have a special trait : Ability to learn from our mistakes and  bounce back stronger. I did just that, found that perfect door every time which was kept open for me  though what I hoped and wished was completely different. People around me feel that there is no point in living a well scripted play. Even OSWALD says so (Octopuses are never this cute). I like it this way, the script is definitely Indian with full of rainbow colors :). It gives me a sense of satisfaction that I have not wasted yet another day on Earth. Planning helps me to utilize my energy in the right direction. I do agree that, living life by the rule books can suck out the fun element.  How do you like your life? Planned or Random?

P.S: I spent my entire vacation on a single pair of jeans and borrowed clothes.

NO-N-SENSE

Blogger, How would I have survived without you?. My heart is for the moment brimming with sadness and it feels good to believe that on opposite side of this screen sits an invisible man, with a warm hand assuring me that everything is going to be just fine. I stand with no regrets what so ever. I live in a world with rules created by me, for  my convenience.Today I sit slouching on the chair, unaware of the damage my heated conversation has done . I have no one to speak to, to shout at, to laugh with and the words are trailing off. I don't approve of presenting myself in  a vulnerable spot in front of a mass audience  still, as I find myself in a difficult spot I can do nothing but turn on my system and type away. May be the words are an added burden, not something you would want to read. Why would anyone waste their time reading something confusing and depressing still if you do, please pray for me, my dreams, my life. Things are rapidly spinning out of control and what I wished is not my present.It's stupid to wish for things far stretched but, what I wished was not rocket science but, a simple life with 0 complications.

I hate you (Like I love you)

My relationship with rain can be better summed up by the song from Delhi Belli. Just few days before You saw me marveling the beauty of rain from the INDOORS here, but today I am singing all together a different song. Its been raining continuously for 6 months now and I have this AAAW (Term coined by G's mates in B-school) feeling whenever I see sun shining through the clouds.

On a holiday, watching rain through the window with a mug of tea in your hand. Well, that's love.

On a working day, when you find your formal wear damp n wet .Well, that's hate.

On a hot summery day, as you take out the tissue to wipe off excess sweat wishing if it rained.Well, that's love.

On a rainy day, when your brother refuses to leave you to office .Well,that's hate.

On a suppose to be dull day, you get drenched in rain and watch the nature  in the after rain glow. Well, that's love.

On a damp day,when your co-passengers scream at you for not properly holding your umbrella .Well, that's hate.

I have million reasons to Love-Hate RAIN. 

On a completely random note, I can't see past the word cute. Anything cute steals my heart be it kids, pretty hairbands or cheeky romantic films. I have been constantly telling myself (Or rather societal pressure) to grow up, to accept the fact that I am no more 16-17. I know there is no connection what so ever between my likeness for cute things and my general attitude towards life. But people expect me to act my age, take up things that suits my age, dress up like a 23 year old. I doubt, I mean why do I have to grow up, fill my heart with age serum, let my body think I am old. I am not and I simply refuse to believes so. I am from the temple of belief that once you let you heart grow old, the body will automatically follow and then there is no stopping the grey hairs and growing stress lines. Let me celebrate the child in me, live my life stress free, enjoy every second what GOD has gifted. Random thoughts, random musings, random ideas.

Must be wondering about the source of inspiration right?. Presenting to you one of my latest buys.I am not denying the fact that they are CUTE.

Fighting for Dreams

I knew my brother was home, he usually drops in when his laundry bags are full and has no more strength to hold his stinky clothes. He stays at a home away from home a.k.a HOSTEL. I rang him up and 'requested' him to pick me up from office. Its easy to manipulate him, especially when bike and long drives are involved. The only downfall to this arrangement is the occasional pitstops he would make at his favorite eateries. He agreed(Good for me) and in 20 minutes we were off on the bike. The guy looked upset and I instantly matched his uneasiness to the robotics competition he participated early morning that day. This time, it was not just his laundry that forced him to come home but, a robo wars competition in a near by college. If there is anything that my lousy brother and his alpha male gang is passionate about that's gotta be ROBOTICS. I know the kind of efforts they had put in, the late night chats is a testimonial to the statement.He rings me up at odd hours cause he had soldering to finish and he wants to distract his mind from the drowziness that was trying to take control of his eyes. We would have long pointless talks and after 1 hours or so, he would warn me that I shouldn't be keeping awake late and off he goes to his own world. Mom and dad never understood his obsession and his frequent dipping attendance.For them anything outside academics had to be dealt with after college hours. I knew what he was upto .During all those missed class hours, he would be out there fighting for his dreams, battling for supremacy with his robos in robowars competitions. The guys would miss their lunch so that they can save their pocket money for the best component available. And being his sister it was quite an obvious question to ask"How was the competition,?"I tried to shout it out loud, the wind wouldn't allow my voice to reach his distracted ears."Well, we reached until semis, couldn't beat the other guys cause they had Bosch motors.Our motors didn't even stand a chance to begin with" he replied. "Why didn't you buy Bosch motor then" I asked."We don't have cash!!!" aah a hard hit on my back."MONEY!!!"it's easier for an employed person like me to think of money as just another element in my life but, for a student like him with limited resources...money was indeed precious, especially when you have to give penny-wise account of parent's money ( pocket money) spent."We are not competing again, we are short of cash"he added with a slight hint of despair in his voice. Sacrificed meals, extra efforts in terms of taking tutions, travelling by local class tickets these guy did whatever they could, for their dream to shape into reality . I could say nothing, just think of my good old times when learning was limited to the exam syllabus, funds were never short of only ideas lacked punch(I studied in a posh self financing college, whereas my brother is a student of a prestigious Govt college). Life was easy for us, teachers always used to spoon feed us, train us to fetch ranks, there was no freedom of speech, there were no free periods. The college boasted of 100 % placements in the paper to attract prospective students. I am not against my alma matter but, the point I want to make is:Things were easy, perfect infact too perfect for us but, for these highly talented engineers of tomorrow everyday is a struggle:strikes,no classes,no teachers, no funds still majority comes back fighting bagging core jobs earning 13-14 lakhs per year in the initial phase of their life. What makes me respect them is their vigor to learn and to apply the same . I promised my brother funds for making their dream come true, some small help that I can extend from within my limits. The money I waste on shopping is more than enough to makes these kids happy.These kids are the future of tomorrow and their dreams should not die a premature death cause of shortage of cash. You and me wouldn't be sitting and blogging if not for the trust Mr. Andy Bechtolsheim, co-founder of Sun Microsystems had on Larry Page and Sergey Brin, developers of GOOGLE .

MIRROR, MIRROR on the wall

I spend my boring weekends reading and spending a considerable amount of time surfing the net. I am an avid blogger since 2006, the year when I decided to get away with the habit of putting my thoughts on a dairy cause it presented an array of complications from, my brother sneaking into my personal life via my diaries to finding a new diary every year. My transition from paper to e-pages was quite smooth. I never felt the urge to publish my real name cause, I like the aura of mysterious charm and the privacy that blogosphere provides me. The news of my personal blog was shared with a few as it provided me the perfect platform to let know the other person what I am thinking at the moment, it eased out lot of conflicts within and gave me a perspective to start afresh each day. I wrote cause I wanted to, I am no wizard when it comes to words, just that I can manage my words and have my adjustable grip over em. As time passed my style evolved too and slowly but, steadily this blog became a part of my life. Even today, some of the old memories bring out smile on my lips. 5 years have passed and this blog has been always my pillar of support.

Over time my tastes have changed rapidly from teenage blog following-family blog following-fashion blog following, I amuse myself during each milestone periods of my life. My current favourite? Well, fashion blogs and I have quite a few bookmarked. May be age is catching up with me, or is it the desire to look good and the happiness that reflects when you see someone wear something that you don’t have the guts to wear?. What is that I like about fashion blogging ?the colours, stories, trend alerts, mix ‘n’ match and whole lot more to be precise.

I am not much of a dresser myself, I can easily camouflage myself into the regular looking crowd and you will never spot me J. I look like your regular neighborhood not so stylish 23 year old .I am faced by so many constrains that holds me back from experimenting with my looks

1. Socio-environmental constrains: In my place sleeveless/shorts/peep toes/attention seeking colors are a definite NO-N). You can give the above a miss if you have a chauffeur to drop you from the place you want to go to your home, but if you have parents like mine who insist that you be part of a larger environmental movement by traveling in public transport then the above constrain is definitely applicable to you.
2. Even the climate (hot/humid/rains) doesn’t allow me to wear my heart out.
3. Budget constraints are non-existent because I have a job that pays me well.
4. Absence of any major retail giants in your city can be yet another constrain.

Sandwiched in between all these constrains if I don’t manage to impress you how can you blame me huh?. No one expects me to give em a piece of advice on fashion so, it’s all fair.

After going through the all the blogs I did realise something about myself, that I do have an enviable collection of earrings and after numerous number of thinking-analyzing-rethinking I decided that I would start a new blog showcasing my earring collection and thus, A GIRL WITH A PEARL EARRING came into existence. This particular blog is not like my personal blog where, nothing what I write doesn’t has to be understood by the reader. They may not make any sense most of the time, not if you don’t know the REAL me. I wish ki the other blog (, A GIRL WITH A PEARL EARRING) get a small fan/critic base and people read/reject/throw stones/reject my so called obsession with earrings. For that matter of fact MIRROR will always be my first love, the thing I cherish for being PERSONAL. This might clear some airs about posts from A GIRL WITH A PEARL EARRING getting published on my facebook wall quite frequently.

I do follow some blogs religiously, some which I can relate to, some which I like from a distance, some which I admire well, most of the places I may/may not leave a comment based on what catches my fancy. Most of the times I just read and make a quite exit as I don’t want the reader to be pressurized into replying to my comment or as a return of favor visit my blog. This blog (MIRROR) has given me so much freedom, so much courage to write on/about things I care and it will continue to remain so.